I have accomplished nothing this year and that reality came rushed to my attention today. Sure, one of my friends would argue that I've had internships, worked on a couple of side projects, gained some "work experience" but nothing that propels me forward in life or in a direction of achieving my goals. I even experienced an emotion close enough to love I ever want to come close to recently and somehow I've convinced myself experiencing that was/is important in life. How can you truly live and never have loved? Well today the reality of everything sent me into an emotional roller-coaster, one second I lost all hope, drive, ambition, the next phase was depression, then suddenly optimism somewhere, a prayed a couple of time here and there, I gave up, re-encouraged myself, gave up again, one tear fell, then suddenly I've never been happier. Why? I have no idea.
Well, not true I immediately wanted to re-launch this blog. I wanted to pour out my emotions in writing. I want to get back into writing. Then suddenly I got excited. Excited!? I still haven't figured that out.
I'm about to go meet up with one of my best friends right now to talk about "my situation". I'm horrible at communicating, this will be awkward, full of questions I won't know how to fully answer, and potentially frustrating for both of us. *sigh*
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